Idea for television programme: political panel discussion show in which politicians, academics, business people, trade unionists, journalists etc etc. answer questions posed by outraged/disenfranchised/occasionally deranged audience members. Dickie-bow wearing gentleman chairs the discussion. The programme would be called:

Politics Tonight With Stella Artois

Participants must imbibe several pints of the programme sponsor's brew prior to recording. This would give the show the feel of that much-loved forum for political discussion: the pub debate. Outlandish, Stella-fuelled viewpoints that do not conform to politically correct modes would be expressed. Politicians might give a few straight answers (ok, that's stretching it) . Since the programme would be one long ad for the magical,personality-transforming qualities of Belgium's finest 5% brew, there would be no worries on the finance score.

Even if the debate is boring, the night will almost certainly culminate with some level of fisticuffs, a frequent by-product of the consumption of Stella. Tell me you wouldn't watch Questions and Answers if there was a real possibility of John Bowman headbutting Martin Cullen. Admit it, we've all wanted to do it at one time or another.

Another version of this show would involve the consumption of Buckfast, but it would probably only be suitable for transmission after midnight on one of the trashier satellite channels.